Our Future

What does the future hold for us? Are we destined for greatness as we all once imagined as a kid, or destined for a dismal failure as we unfortunately see more times than we wish in today’s world?

When I sit down and take a look at the life I have lived, I often times wonder about past decisions and mistakes and think: “Man, if I had done that differently, I’d be in so much better shape” or “If this situation turned out like I had planned, everything would be smooth sailing from here.” And I am under the impression that these are normal thoughts that a person has on a daily (well maybe not that often) basis. 

Every decision I make is based on a choice “I” make, yes?

I put “I” in quotations for a reason here, let me explain.

A conscious decision I make ie a relationship, a major in college, joining the military, becoming friends with new people is all in a plan that we believe is in our best interest.  We make these choices based on other people’s opinions, what we have heard, and how previous decisions pan out.

But what if we changed our mindset to make a decision, no matter how small, only after having a conversation with God about it first?  Before you buy that car, before you get serious with that girl, before you change jobs, or change life paths?  Why not stop for a couple minutes to talk about it with the creator of the universe first?  These talks will NOT change His mind, but chances are they will change ours and that is the goal here; change our minds and get us to the place He wants us to be.

The bible states in Jeremiah 29:11:  “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Also in proverbs 3:6: “In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” So why don’t we converse with God before making decisions, even on the smallest level? Is it we don’t have the time? Is it that maybe it just doesn’t cross our minds?

Think of a life where every decision was well thought out and discussed with our creator? How much better of a world this would be.

Selfishness is a problem.

When I wake up in the morning and evaluate the tasks I need to get accomplished through the day, there is always something in the back of my mind that makes me wonder "Am I really doing what I am meant to do?" I tend to overanalyze things, but it is a fair point to consider. People tend to work hard to have things they want in life, monitary things such as a nice car or house, and that is a fair point, but is it really what we need to be doing?

What we need to be doing and what we actually do as humans are very different. Unfortunatly it will be that way, it is human nature. Just allow yourself to think...if we, for one day alone, took the time to stop being selfish and help a neighbor? Give to a charity? Love your family and friends no matter what has happened in the past? Forgive everyone and give yourself the chance to smile? Quite a thought indeed.

There is nothing wrong with self-motivation, but there is with selfishness. Maybe one day everyone can feel the bliss that comes from doing for others what others can't do for themselves. Maybe.

Pushover or Adult? You be the Judge.

I pride myself in always being a man of my word, and I will always attempt to do just that to the best of my ability, no matter the circumstance.  I am often received as weak minded and/or a "pushover" by friends and relatives who honestly do want the best for me, but how can I find logic in being mean toward someone who has done me wrong many different times and hurt me? Aren't we as Christians meant to forgive and move on?

I can see why people find that logic nonsensical, and how when a person does them wrong, they see no need to help them or be friendly with them no matter what has been said in the past.  But myself, I can't go back on something I have said and meant at one point so seriously.  Circumstances to change and humans will be humans, constantly in the search for happiness and causing a path of destruction along their respective path, but how does hurting another person help any situation? It certainly wouldn't help me feel any better over the situation.

All I want to say is, when you are dealing with a person who has hurt you many different times or a situation when you have been crossed or a goal wasn't met that really perturbed you, fighting back with the same thing that hurt you is never a good option. Take the high road.  Befriend that person who hurt you.  Turn that bad situation in to a positive one.  Learn from their mistakes and apply them to your life.  Any situation  can be turned for good if you allow it to.


"All things work together for good to those that love him, to those who are called according to his purpose" -Romans 8:28

Change

Change is inevitable.  It will occur at some point in our lives whether we like it or not.  In small instances it occurs everyday.  People who we considered friends betray us, loved ones leave, new friends are made, relationships created and destroyed daily, those we trust give us reason to lose the trust, all change.  Humans hate change, they dread it, I dread it.  No one who is in a comfortable position in life wants a change, but sometimes it is unavoidable.  What is the purpose? Why do "good things" change to "bad" so often and so quickly?

Too often we as humans don't stop and think for a moment "what if this is not best for me?" It is a scary thought when we are comfortable but it is one that should cross our minds.  Is that friendship beneficial to me in the long run? Is this relationship really going to last? Do I really love this person? and if you can honestly, and I mean without a shadow of doubt HONESTLY, think so, by all means continue and live life to its fullest.  But there is always that chance when you wake up in the morning and everything is different, and at that point, what do you do? Nothing is meant to last forever, and as sad as that sounds, it is true nonetheless.

Its a scary proposition, what are your plans for the worst case scenario? Its lurking out there. Think about it.

“Things change and friends leave. Life doesn't stop for anybody.” -Stephen Chbosky

Patience = Love

"Love ain't a thing, love is a verb"

I am often faced pondering "what is love? and have I ever felt it?"  That is a very broad statement and can be taken in many different directions.  Everyone has felt some sort of connection with another being whether it be your Mother and Father, your brothers and sisters, your distant family, even a pet.  Of course there is no such thing as a totally exclusive statement, but I feel as if everyone has felt that sort of family connection and I do believe that is a form of love.

There is also the all inclusive love that God has for all of his children.  This is a statement I can make with certainty because no matter your situation, no matter your past transgressions, no matter your current situation God loves you more than you will ever know.  Many people, unfortunately, don't take the time to acknowledge the love that is given everyday by our God and every day someone misses the chance to give God thanks for his love is a day wasted.

The specific type of love I am concerned with is the love of a companion, a partner, a girlfriend, a boyfriend, a couple.  Are we predestined to be with someone? Can we build love with a friend and allow it to blossom into a beautiful Hollywood love story? Is it possible we have already been with and left the one person we were meant to be with? All of these questions run through my head like an Olympic sprinting event and I really have no stationary position to start from.  My past relationships have ended up in tears and I am one to believe it occurred for a reason. To allow for my maturation to occur and to open my eyes to what is really important in my life right now. 1 John 4:18 says "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear: because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." You can take that literally and say There is no fear in love, The man who feels that he loves God with all his heart can never dread him as his Judge. Or spin it in a direction that can be used in an earthly sense and say there is no fear in love, that love is pure and there is nothing to hide. It can only occur when two people can discuss anything without problem and allow for a constant stream of communication.  As I think of that I see friends of mine leaving their partners of significant time periods recently and I really question myself even more.  Did I have true love at one point? Did they have it? Can true love evaporate? Was there never any true love at all in any of our relationships?  As a man who has an anchor to always turn to when the tides get tough and the current tends to send my boat astray, it does mean something to me when someone comes to me and wants to talk about why it happens.  I always turn to God and quote Romans 8:28 "All things work together for good to those that love him, to those who are called according to his purpose." Its the sentence by which I live my life. Patience is key when awaiting that special person into my or anyone's life.  All things work together FOR GOOD. There is no debating that, its set in stone.  Break-ups and fights happen for a reason.  Move past the anger and resentment and find out why it happened and improve yourself from the experience you've had.

Now that is a lot to take in, I am aware.  To many love is a four letter word, taboo if you will.  To others it is magnificent because they have found that special someone to share their life with and are assured they are right for one another.  What about people like me? Somewhere in the middle. Confused and not sure how to approach love in the appropriate fashion.  The best possible advice I can give, coming from a man who has had feelings so strong for someone he had no idea what to do with himself, to standing in a corner alone watching life pass me by, is patience.  Love can not be forced, love can not be wanted by one person and not the other.  Sometimes it is instant, sometimes it is built over many years.  All I know is love is illusive and will one day, by the Grace of God, bless me and you too if you approach it with the right attitude.

"I don't have answers, and neither do you, but I know the pain of a heartbreak" -Ben Rector

Action?

If Jesus exists he don't live in the pages we write, he'd say put down your books and come follow me out in the light... -Peter Bradley Adams

This may be just a folk lyric, but is it more? Christians cling to the Bible, it is a thing of wonder. The only book on earth that you can read for 2000 consecutive days, and yet find new meaning each time. This is a magnificent thing, but can it be a bit of a cover up, a way for a christian to be lazy?

I see tons of people saying "I'll pray for you" or "I'll be thinking of you".  The sentiments are rarely taken negativity and usually can help sooth a bad situation, but could a person do more? A million good vibes toward a person is a great thing, but it is not as effective as one person taking action.

What am I saying? Stop praying? ABSOLUTELY NOT. Stop expressing feelings of empathy or sympathy toward a person? of course not.  Its a simple reminder that actions speak much louder than words..

Daily Routine.

     I tend to believe that humans of similar characteristic flock together. This is not really a bad thing, it is just natural to us.  Why is this a drawback? I believe that any time a person feels more comfortable around another, they will stay in a ritual leading them in a similar place.  As a man, I have been through many different relationships, friendly and romantic, and many of those relationships are still as strong as ever today.  But the ones that I have let go are just as important to my growth as a person.  Don't be the person who flocks with the same people every day of life.  Allow yourself to expand your horizons, you never know what God has laid out on the other side.

As the old saying goes "The grass is always greener" In a practical sense, I tend to believe that.  Allow yourself the chance to see the vivid green that just may lay in your blind spot.